3:00 : S finishes first breast; sleepily hold her over the bowl and am pleased to catch a big pee.
3:02 : Foregoes a cloth diaper, which she usually wears to bed, thinking I can be vigilant and catch pees all night and lays S on the puddle pad to give her second breast
3:15: S is fidgety and won't stay on the breast; try to burp her then hold her over the bowl again. Nothing.
3:30: S is verrry awake and excitable
3:35: Hold over bowl again, knowing she's got to go. Still nothing. Try burping. Nothing.
3:38-3:59: Wonder when the little Live Wire is going to run out of juice.
4:00: Hear baby pass gas; put hand out to steady myself to turn on the lamp; put hand directly in hot poop. Scramble to sit up; get poop all the way to elbow and onto the edge of the duvet.
4:01: Get light turned on. Feel something warm on leg and see that S has finally peed and it has leaked off the plastic we put beneath the puddle pads and onto the sheets...
4:40: Finally have a clean baby, a clean me, get my bedding sorting and a fresh puddle pad ready, still not prepared to diaper her. Lay baby down, turn off lights. S starts squirming again. I check and see that she has peed. Again...
And where is J in all of this? Away on deployment, naturally. :P
In case it doesn't come through in the post, I was actually laughing about the whole thing. It was very Murphy's Law. If you are going to try natural infant hygiene, go into it with your sense of humor intact.