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Are those tears on your cheeks?

Some tears, some rain.

Yesterday, I drove 2 hours to rendezvous with my mother-in-law.  We picnicked together, at a parking lot just after a toll booth--there were no tables, so we had to sit on the tiled flooring...surrounding the public toilets--and after we ate, we each drove back our separate ways. Only the Sprout was no longer in my car; she was with my mother-in-law, going to stay a week with her while Julien and I clean and pack the apartment.

Just before I arrived at the drop-off spot, a song by French singer Renaud "Morgane de toi" (link opens YouTube video) came on the radio. The first line of the chorus is: "J'suis qu'un fantôme quand tu vas où j'suis pas" (I'm just a ghost when you go where I can't follow), and hearing it, I started crying. The Sprout just turned 23 months old, and it is the first time I've ever been separated from her.  

And driving away from her, I got weepy again. Not with sadness, just with the realization of time moving on, of longer separations to come.

Last night, I was planning on sleeping hard, finally catching up on almost two years of broken sleep. Wouldn't you know I woke up at least four times. So much for a little R and R without the wee one to care for.

After seeing her on Skype this morning at her grandma's, Julien and I decided to take a little overnight trip to Spain.  The weather forecast said the day would be cloudy, with some sun. We saw only clouds and, after passing San Sebastien, buckets and buckets of rain.

Oh well. The countryside is still beautiful. I just hope we have a wee bit of good light and dryness tomorrow morning to enjoy the hermitage of San Juan de Gaztelugatxe. And if Julien feels up to it (he's coming down with our crud. >.< ), we'll go visit the Guggenheim Museum in Bilbao.

Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
mindseas
Sep. 26th, 2012 12:53 pm (UTC)
I remember when my kids were very small, I couldn't relax if I didn't hear them and know where they were.
mnfaure
Oct. 8th, 2012 09:00 pm (UTC)
Yes, the first days were very weird, the quietness almost surreal.
asakiyume
Sep. 26th, 2012 05:24 pm (UTC)
Not with sadness, just with the realization of time moving on

I understand totally. ((hugs))
mnfaure
Oct. 8th, 2012 09:01 pm (UTC)
After a week, I found her so big, her hair so long. Yes, that time is moving, moving...
sunflower_sky
Sep. 26th, 2012 06:09 pm (UTC)
Wow, I don't think I've ever spent that long away from my kids. (The only time I can think of is the day and a half I was in labor with R2/sleeping after the birth....) Good for you. I have a hard enough time leaving the older two with a sitter for the evening. :-/

Enjoy the quiet time, and I hope you get better sleep in the next few days. (I tend to wake up frequently also when the kids start sleeping longer stretches. It's what your body is used to...)

~D
mnfaure
Oct. 8th, 2012 09:02 pm (UTC)
I tried to enjoy it, but I had too much going on to really "appreciate" it. That's all right, though. She is soon going to be at an age where she is less demanding; we are already getting there. Then will come the days when I wish she needed me more. :P
kmkibble75
Sep. 27th, 2012 01:27 am (UTC)
But they'll be lots of happiness to come with it, too.
mnfaure
Oct. 8th, 2012 09:03 pm (UTC)
Very true. Always have to look on the bright side. :D
khiemtran
Sep. 29th, 2012 10:29 pm (UTC)
Last night, I was planning on sleeping hard, finally catching up on almost two years of broken sleep. Wouldn't you know I woke up at least four times. So much for a little R and R without the wee one to care for.

I know that feeling (although we've only had the one)! Hope you have a great time in Spain!
mnfaure
Oct. 8th, 2012 08:31 pm (UTC)
We did have a great time. I hope I can find a moment to post about it soon. I'm so behind on journalling...and responding to messages!
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )

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